Getting Along with Each Other


The High Maintenance Attraction

There have been any number of spouses who have been dumped by the wayside, and they often wonder what happened. They see their former spouse moving on to be with someone who always makes unreasonable demands, yet the few demands they had in the relationship were seldom met. Even worse, they are often subjected to the new partner’s tantrums at their children’s events when they do not get what they want. Understanding the high maintenance attraction is a path to understanding, but it may still not ease the pain.

Many people believe they can only ask in a responsible and reasonable manner for the things they want or need in a relationship, and most of them try their best to stay within bounds. A high maintenance person refuses to even see there are any limits, and this somehow attracts partners. The more they demand the more they get, and the cycle is an upward spiral. The person who is attracted to someone like believes they are getting something in return, and it is often a sense of satisfaction.

Looks are much more important to some people than others, and the person who dances to the demands of a high maintenance spouse believes their spouse’s looks are what keeps them in their social circle. The behavior exhibited is often childish to many, but the person who leaves an undemanding spouse for this type of relationship admires the raw energy and selfishness of their new spouse. They fail to see what others do, and they get a thrill whenever the behavior is paraded in front of others.

For those who have been left for someone like this, they are luckier than they can ever guess. An adult who is willing to tolerate this type of behavior from a spouse is not as mature as they might appear, and their failure to do anything about it shows a lack of character. There is nothing wrong with being reasonable within a relationship, and there are still singles out there who will appreciate it.